10 years ago we decided on our future children’s names and then we waited. Planning, saving, paying our way through university, “doing the right thing” and waiting until we were financially able to have our mini-us.
Well, infertility is a B*TCH.
18 months ago we discussed our financial status and 5 year plan. 16 months ago we made the choice. 12 months ago we started actively trying to get pregnant. 10 months ago we got COVID from workplace exposure. 8 months ago we became suspicious, statistically the majority of normal couples would have been pregnant by then. We took an at home sperm test that came back negative and so began our journey for answers.
Months before the doctors had told us we were young and healthy, that there shouldn’t be any complications. It was nerve wracking not understanding what was going on. Was 10 years of birth control, over $5,000 in out of pocket expense at time we couldn’t afford it actually medically necessary? Not to mention the physical and mental toll the hormones put on me, was it all for nothing?
7 months ago we sought help from a urologist, the lab results indicated high white blood cell count likely from COVID. Okay, limited studies showed promise it was temporary. We just had to keep trying and wait.
5 months ago we took another test which showed improvement but was still below minimum scores. The struggle with infertility continued. More waiting and no answers.
3 months ago we moved States to obtain insurance that covers fertility benefits so we can seek diagnosis and treatment. This was going to get expensive fast. We live in the US after all and for all the politicians crying about low birthrates, they’re sure doing a good job of doing nothing to implement broad based coverage of infertility testing and treatments. Not to mention the lack of paid family leave, social supports, or subsidized childcare so workers can remain productive in the economy that pays their salaries.
2 months ago, the at home test again showed negative despite limited studies indicating full fertility should have returned in the long term after COVID.
More testing is needed. However, because of the abusive employer, we do not have the insurance coverage we need to figure out what’s medically wrong with either of us. More waiting for us it seems.
I want to better track our spending and infertility journey because the lack of open communication on the subject in the public sphere needs to be addressed. Also want to provide just general awareness to seek testing to confirm fertility early in one’s life if they have even a small idea of wanting kids someday. Doctors can’t say you won’t have problems without real testing and having the knowledge 10 years ago would have significantly changed our lives.
At the end of the day, if we don’t have any fertility related issues then it is likely caused by COVID. That is an even bigger hit because we caught it while serving fellow citizens in vital roles from coworkers who don’t care if they destroy other’s lives by going to work sick. No one would be held accountable because no one knows for sure who it was as the whole office outside our team ran around unmasked and sick.
Once we obtain insurance we’re looking at an estimated $3,600 for diagnostics and if we need to seek IVF treatments we would have 3 rounds free +medication (which is about $9000) assuming we were still in the same benefit year. If it doesn’t work after 3 tries, the price jumps to 8k with Medication per try or we can get a package deal of 6 tries for 20k+ medication costs. To put this into contexts, right now I barely clear 36k/year in take home pay from a job that offers zero fertility testing or coverage. If it weren’t for the employer funded FSA last year, I wouldn’t have been able to afford half of what we paid out already. While this is (hopefully) temporary, it’s unrealistic to expect us to be able to receive the medical care we need.
For the sake of reduced torture, I’m only going to provide updates quarterly. This doesn’t include the cost of emotional distress of grief.
| At home sperm testing | $80 |
| At home pregnancy/ovulation testing | $85 |
| Doctor visits and lab testing | $270 |
| Prenatal Vitamins and scientifically significant ayurveda fertility medicine | $620 |
| Total Paid after sales tax | $1,055 |
| Time eclipsed | 12 months/13 cycles |
Between the tracking, we also track our net worth which you can see here. Make sure to follow for updated costs as well as cross reference to fellow FIRE buddies also going through it. Want to read more in the mean time? Check out this Kaiser Foundation study.
